Be Weird. Do Weird.

My superpower

In high school, I had a super power. I really did! I was a master of the card catalog. That’s right. I was able to find anything I wanted in the pre-digital age with a card catalog. It came in handy for book reports and research papers. It was a great skill until computers and word searches superseded, the now arcane, subject search used in card catalogs.

Although I enjoyed my super power, I exacted the skill incognito. I didn’t want anyone to know that I had librarian skills with the card catalog. I thought it was weird. I would go to the library at odd hours or travel to a different city to research a Wordsworth collection of poetry or interpretive “coffee table” books on Dali’s master works. I didn’t mind “being” weird; I just didn’t want anyone to witness me “doing” weird.

Equation for blessing

Recently, the topic of “willing and obedient” has taken center stage in my thought and prayer life. “If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land; But if you refuse and rebel, you will be devoured by the sword. For the mouth of the Lord has spoken it.” Isaiah 1:19-20 AMPC.

So the equation goes like this:
Willingness + Obedience = Fullness of God’s Blessing.
Remove either component and you don’t qualify for the blessing.

Yikes! How many times have I obeyed begrudgingly?! “I’ll do it, but I don’t have to like it.” But to eat the good of the land, “you’ll do it and you’ll like it!” What that means to me is an introspective “card catalog” search on all the areas of my life where the equation has fallen apart. Where have I unwillingly obeyed? Where have I willingly fallen short of obeying?

Kings and dogs

Another version of the passage reads like this: ““Come. Sit down. Let’s argue this out.” This is GOD ’s Message: “If your sins are blood-red, they’ll be snow-white. If they’re red like crimson, they’ll be like wool. If you’ll willingly obey, you’ll feast like kings. But if you’re willful and stubborn, you’ll die like dogs.” That’s right. GOD says so.” Isaiah 1:18-20 MSG

Hmm...feast like kings or die like dogs? Hard choice.

Funny how fast I can change my “will” when blessings are on the line. Bad attitudes turned good, just like that.

New superpower revealed

In September of 1997, God impressed on my spirit my new super power: the gift of healing. Oh my. I mean, wow, to offer shalom peace, nothing broken and nothing missing to those who are hurting is a tremendous gift. It is also a huge responsibility. For someone who prefers to exercise superpowers in secret, I had a decision to make: willingly obey or forfeit the blessing.

Healer, heal thyself

This superpower was revealed a few short months after I sustained a life-changing back injury. How was I going to pray in faith for healing for others when my body needed healing? There were times in my life where my body felt good and other times I writhed in pain. All along, the enemy of my soul was there to feed fear and doubt for my own healing.

Did I lack the faith I needed to be healed? “So faith comes from hearing, that is, hearing the Good News about Christ.” Romans 10:17 NLT.

It seemed I was experiencing a new equation:
God’s Truth on a Subject + Hearing = Faith in that Subject.

Makes sense though. Scripture is clear on God’s will for us to be saved and healed, but it seems the American Church has watered down teachings of the latter. If the average Christian heard faith-filled teachings on healing as much as we heard teachings on salvation, the church as a whole, would experience more healing in our midst. Perhaps the American Church was afraid to “be weird” too.

New wine

In June of 2017, the Lord impressed on my spirit how I would be made whole. The healing power of God would flow through me and cleanse me as it was released to work in others. My “will” took on a whole new mission: listen to every faith filled sermon regarding receiving and ministering healing. Build my faith through hearing and set out to obey by exercising the gift of healing “for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.” Philippians 2:13 NKJV

Just one problem

I grew up in the Pentecostal church. The gifts of the Holy Spirit were prevalent all throughout my adolescence and adult life. And the one thing that was consistent was this: the lady that cried through worship and the person who gave a word of knowledge and laid hands on others regarding healing were a bit weird. AND NOW I WAS BOTH OF THEM! Dear me.

Abridged conversations in my head were usually a combination of asking God for another way that wasn’t “weird” and feeling impressed in my spirit a number of scriptures that encouraged me to be strong, courageous and obedient. This one sums them up nicely:

“Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do. This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:8-9 NLT

My “will” struggles, but was ultimately won over by God’s complete “shalom” peace and unfailing love. And then, I asked for forgiveness for judging the man and woman of God who had the courage to obey in ways that society judges as “weird.” They have superpowers!

Reconciling with myself

I was a teen mentor for many years and enjoyed working with them. The real and raw didn’t play games or mince words. You always knew where you stood. If you don’t walk with confidence, they will eat you for lunch and smile. I used to say, “I’m a dork, but in my dorkdom, I am the queen.” It was my way of saying, this is who I am, and I own it. Like it or leave it, but I reign over myself and like who I am.

I experienced real freedom when I decided, “I am weird, but in my weirdom, I am the queen.” That was the day I decided to “be weird, do weird” for His glory.

So if you see me crying in church, laying hands on someone to pray or acting odd, say a prayer for me...that I would continue to be willing and obedient...and “do weird.” Better yet, do weird with me. Can you imagine what the body of Christ would enjoy if we all would “do weird” together in accordance with our individual gifts?! Wow! Just wow!